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    1 week ago

3.14.2005

眼鯨鯨

看了六場藝術節和兩套舞台劇和數個projects
當然眼鯨鯨 (不知道有沒有正寫呢?)
不過主要都係因為病倒了, 所以目光有點呆滯

呢排搞到無心向學, 都唔知係因為太累定係懶有藝術
唔想output任何野, 由得我吸收, 我淨係想吸咋
好彩大學都幾頹, d deadline係咁tun, 死唔去

昨晚終於睇埋我最後的05藝術節
o係Arts Center由三點坐到十點半
中間有三個鐘唔郁自己坐係度睇 Love on a Barren Mountain
諗起中學有個先生話我: 「我都冇識人好似你咁架」
因為那陣子去睇電影節, 睇到睡著...又去排隊睇bandshow, 早成兩個鐘, 結果當然好開心咁排第一啦

琥珀 The Nightingale 拜金國際俱樂部 Brazilian Guitar Quartet 像我這樣的一個城市 盼望篇 懷念篇
加唔關事的 愛情戲 和 老馬有火
這兩個多星期就是晚晚不歸家
今天報應來了, 咳得要了我的命!

咁多, 唔係度講感受
今年第一年實行了寫感想在場刊計劃
希望年年以後都keep到

只有愛情戲不是自己睇
今年也是第一年自己睇哂全部藝術節
想了個美好的籍口: 把自己浸在寂寞中
他朝那個人陪你看, 套套也一起看
那就更顯他珍貴了....

睇拜金時撞到郭啟華, 佢話:
「你又自己一個, 乜你冇朋友架?」
次次他都是碰上我一個, 都唔知點答
可能有少少鐘意佢, 所以都覺得佢講中左少少

其實那天之前都有點唔開心
望著台上的拜金
他們的歌詞都很辣
聽聽下想抬頭看看....
上面的disco波波灑呀灑....
一點點光像雪般飄下來....
直望螢幕上出現了四個毛筆大字...
「總覺寂寞」
加上音樂, 真的眼紅了

今 我春日厭厭無心

那天趁著點點愁緒
都為自己的名字作了首詩
知不知道名字對一個人的意義?
"I will not have another name in this life." - The Crucible


ps 喜歡人山人海/明哥/達明的十大特徵
1.好人
2.感性得o黎有少少怪怪地
3.從主流與非主流之間搵到中心點
4.文化藝術唔少得[都是頗牛棚的人]
5.頗為憤世嫉俗
6.些少傳染性自戀[學到教主]
7.日頭光天化日﹐夜晚下落不明
8.應該安靜時就安靜,應該狂野時就狂野
9.信奉明教﹐宗旨系完美主義[仲有好多其他主義]
10.雖寂寞,但快樂
(from PMPS message board -- see external link beside blog title)

6 comments:

Lee Man Kay said...

re:
leave in my blogspot la
here seems like sofei, u and my newsgroup

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

i kind of agree with the very last sentense 'lonely but happy', or the word lonely shouldn't be used, just being 'alone' doesn't mean anything bad at all, sometimes i feel lonely when there are people around...and feeling that i can never get into their 'circle'....

Linda

Anonymous said...

so same msg 2 times!!
cheap me...

to continue la..the worst thing is not being alone, is being SEEN alone, and being JUDGED by that...i dun want to appear 自戀, but in some way, those who judge a 'loner' this way is pathetic, since human beings are alone most of the time in their life la..
feeling CIndy kind of differnt by your new postings in my OD la..maybe what u need is a little bit of courage, to convince yourself and others that u are indeed undergoing some sort of 'transition' in life...like second adolescence~

Linda

Karen said...

i have taken a look at your photos...
aiii..
suddenly feel that we are really getting old.....
u r wearing grad gown lorrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...
soooooo ollddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
hey~ will you wear it again next yr?
mo liu yun...

cindy in reply to linda said...

it's so gd u can see it that way, a transition....
yes, but maybe only people like us can treat this seriously

and only ppl like us will not judge alone ppl that way. I dun really mind being seen alone now, I guess ppl of our type will think it's a 'ying and courageous' thing to be able to stand alone in public. So let the 'others' think 飽 her (i thot of we seeing Christine in NA can, remember?)